Professional Translation Comparison
Part of this course was to look at professional translations and compare those to our own translations. This was meant to show us how to look deeply into each of our translations and to understand that every decision we make should have a purpose to enhance the piece. Below are the names of each of the translated works, the professional translations and each translators name. The comparisons will be in the analysis section on each corresponding page.
Juliet Winters Carpenter
"Backstreet Cat"
Sticking out of my bike basket
Somehow they delight me -
Celery leaves
Juliet Winters Carpenter
"Always American"
"Let's go to Spain," you say
as we run down a windy slope -
and I want to go
Jack Stamm
"Alley Cat"
Fluffing up from
a bicycles carrier
Leaves of celery
Looking as if they might be
Having a celebration
Jack Stamm
"Always 'American'"
Running
up a hill, you saying,
"let's go to Spain!"
Yes, let's go,
I think...
Joshua Mostow
The eight-petalled cherries
from the Nara capital
of the ancient past
today nine layers thick
have bloomed within your court!
University of Virginia
Eight-fold cherry flowers
that at Nara--ancient seat
of our state--have bloomed,
in our nine-fold palace court
shed their sweet perfume today
Joshua Mostow and Royall Tyler
Shinobu pattern
Printed in Michinoku,
who then is to blame
for so tangling my heart
when I know it is not I?
Helen Craig McCullough
My thoughts have grown
disordered
as random patterns dyed on cloth
reminiscent of Shinobu in
Michinoku --
and who is to blame?
Surely not I.
Joshua Mostow and Royall Tyler
Back then this man, already well on his way toward the East, sent home to his friends:
Never forget me,
though the long way between us
merges into cloud,
till the sky-wandering moon
at last comes around once more
Helen Craig McCullough
Once a man journeying toward the east sent some of his friends this poem, composed on the way:
Though I am far away
as the realm of clouds,
remember me until I come again,
even as the moon returns
from its celestial journeying.